A Break

I teach. I do many things, as do we all, but teaching is consuming. I am someone who is easily consumed by whatever I am doing. I am a monotasker by nature. But teaching is like consuming chocolate milkshakes. I want it, and at first it is so good. But budget cuts and my governments's low priority on education, prefering to give tax breaks than support our future, have caused my workload to go up substantially. So the one milkshake, desired and enjoyed, has become three or four that must be choked down in one sitting. I worry that my frustration with my workload, and the difficulties of doing it well under the pressure may have caused me to become a worse instructor, when I wish to be better.

Today I gave my last test in my intensive summer course. I have grading yet to do, but the year of eight classes and hundreds of students is effectively done. I now have over a month to try to put my house, my yard, my laboratory, my office, my grad students, back in order. I can breathe the summer air, not weighted by tests, homeworks, lectures, to write, grade, prepare. A break.

We have had an unusually hot June. Air thick and harsh, flowers and weeds growing fast, demanding water and care. Humidity turned the sky white, the sun a blazing eye, unrelenting. Thunderstorms did come occasionally, muttering and rumbling, flashing angrily in the heat, but not enough.

Now, On July 1st, the heat has broken. It will be for only a day or two. Monday is predicted to be back to 90 F (32 C) or higher. But tonight it is beautiful, and tomorrow will be gorgeous. The air tonight was warm and dry. The sky a rich blue overlayed by pink remnants of clouds, producing lavender. The spruce branches waved gently in a light breeze. My Nicotiana is blooming. It reseeded itself wonderfully surviving the snows and ice of winter. Growing fast in the heat it is opening its white flowers on lanky stalks, scenting the evening air with sugar and spice. Tomorrow I will garden, all day perhaps. Move some of the Nicotiana to the back herb garden, plant some potted plants that have been languishing, put down compost and mulch, weed, mow, edge, and maybe in the evening, sit on the back patio with a glass of wine or a margerita, and watch the fireflies winking gold-green in the twilight. A break.